Double Feature - What Does Joe Know / Make Out Monday

It’s that time of year again… time for “What Does Joe Know?”

Every week I will try a new item at Trader Joe’s and post about it on Monday. 
If you don’t have a Trader Joe’s in your area… I’m sorry! 
Really, really sorry! 

If you are a Trader Joe’s fan too, let me know what your favorite TJ’s products are!!

I’m starting small with a new little cracker I just tried for the first time.

 

Savory thin mini Rice Crackers

Multiseed with Soy Sauce

I had the bag ripped open before I checked out and I haven’t stopped eating them since! 

They are a delightful little salty snack. 

**WARNING** they give you horrible breath!  But worth it!

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

And it just happens to be Make Out Monday!

The theme for October is:

 Asian Date Night

or Dasian as my husband called it!

 

Buy some frozen egg rolls, chop sticks and sake and enjoy when the children go to bed!

Or head out like we did for sushi and a Chinese Foot Massage!

 

I'm not sure if the Chinese Foot Massage places have started to spring up in your area, but they seem to be all the rage in Southern California!  I have friends that have gone and rave about it, but I hadn't tried it... until Dasian!

 

It was my husband's idea and we decided we'd go inside and if we didn't feel comfortable, we'd simply say we wanted to get some info!

When we walked in I was surprised to see 2 rows of about 8 cradels with people laying in them, getting their massages!  We were greeted with smiles as the soft spa music played in the dimly lit room. 

I'm not going to lie, there was something creepy, yet inticing about it!  They had 2 cradels side by side for us, so we decided to go for it.  Yea, they're probably called massage tables, but they were low to the ground, very plush and curved up on the sides, so I affectionately named them cradels!

We started off sitting up with our feet in a tub of hot water.  As we soaked, they massaged our neck and shoulders.  I had a man and he was a little too strong for me, so I told him to be a little more gentle.  My eyes were closed and about every 10 minutes he'd whisper in my ear, "this ok?"  The first time it scared me and I jumped! 

Then we got to lay down in the cradel of love.  I kept hearing soft slaps from the other masseuers and I wondered what was going on.  Then I understood.  After my feet were massage, the guy gave me a few little slaps on my feet!  Nothing painful, but definite slaps!  I kept thinking, "why are you so angry at me?"  Well, with each area that was massaged, it ended with a little slap.  Arms done - slap, slap slap.  Legs done - slap slap!  I started laughing and shaking!

Then he said to roll over, so I was face down in the cradel and the unexpected happened - he unfastened my bra!  Oh yea, you're fully clothed for this, so he pulled up my shirt and unfastened my bra.  Then I was really cracking up!  I kept thinking, "is he going to hook that back together or leave it undone?"  Oh, sure enough, after he massaged my back, put a flaming hot towel on my back and roughly rubbed off the oil, he refastened my bra!  I had tears streaming down my face!

Then he yanked my arms around, a few more slaps, and then the butt massage began!  Nothing in appropriate, but a complete butt massage!  There was no "foot massage" about this place! 

I tried so hard to control my laughter, but I think a few snorts came out.

Of course that portion ended with a few butt slaps!

Then he once again whispered in my ear, "that ok?"  I thought, "not really!"  It was over and I looked at my husband - he was in heaven!  He had drifted off to sleep!  Seriously?  You fell asleep?  Didn't you get slapped around?  Didn't that scortching hot towel burn you?

Let's just say it was a very memorable night! 

 

Now it's your turn!  Are you ready for a Dasian adventure?

A Redeeming Love - Chapter 13

A summer romance series, chronicling my love story

Chapter 1, Chapter 2, Chapter 3, Chapter 4, Chapter 5, Chapter 6, Chapter 7, Chapters 8&9,
Chapter 10, Chapter 11, Chapter 12

 

Nothing in Seattle reminded me of Roger.  I had never been to Seattle prior to taking a job up there, so there were no previous memories.  I wasn’t driving around remembering our date at the Space Needle or a breakfast at Portage Bay.  It was a fresh start with all things new.  So once the healing kicked into high gear, it wasn’t long before I didn’t think about Roger at all.  For 7 years I couldn’t get that man off my mind, but now I was free and it felt amazing.  That’s why this large letter came with a bit of a shock.

 “Dear Raeanne,

There are so many things that I want to talk to you about.  I wish I could share these things with you in person.  But, due to the circumstances and out of respect for you, I felt that I should do it by letter.  My hope is that you receive this in such a way as to allow us to meet and for me to share more with you in person…”

 I felt sick reading these words.  Once and for all I was finished with Roger Newquist, but he obviously wasn’t finished with me.  As I read all 6 pages of this letter, nothing stirred within me.  He was open, honest and bold.  He said he was in love with me.  I felt nothing.  I remember putting the letter in a drawer and letting it sit there for about a week.  I didn’t know what to do with it.  I didn’t want to respond.  I had nothing to say.

 I shared the letter with a good friend of mine in Seattle and he said that if any man had the courage to write such a letter, he deserved a reply.  Really?  I had to reply?  I was angry that now I was being put in the position to reject him.  I didn’t like it.  I decided that I’d call so that he knew I received the letter.

 I remember that phone conversation so clearly.  I was totally calm.  He was very nervous.  I told him that I received the letter and I didn’t love him anymore.  I thought being direct was best so there was no room for misinterpretation.  “I don’t love you anymore.”  His response, “Can I take you to dinner?”  WHAT?  I was furious that he was making me repeat myself!  “You don’t understand.  I don’t love you anymore.”  “I know,” he said.  “Can I take you to dinner?”  He urged me to be open and in the end, I agreed to “being open” (whatever that meant) and I’d call him in a few weeks.  I hung up the phone frustrated.

 In the next few days and weeks I would look in the bathroom mirror as I brushed my teeth and simply say, “I’m open.”  To what?  I didn’t know!  But I said I’d be open, so I was being open!  After a few weeks, the only revelation, if you will, that came to me was that Roger was a good guy and if he lived in Seattle I’d go to dinner with him.  I’d give him a little bit of my time.  But he lived in Sacramento, so this was completely foolish.  When I called him to simply shoot him down again, he explained that he’d like to take me to dinner and threw out a date and made all the reservations to fly up to Seattle just to take me to dinner!  He booked a hotel.  He rented a car.  This guy was serious!  I hung up from that conversation thinking he was nuts!  But I was in it for a free meal!

From the Letter:

“Several years ago God asked me two questions, “Do you love me?” and “Do I get to love you?”  I have learned that until I can say yes to both these questions, I do not have the freedom to love anyone else, the way that God wants me to.  And freedom, as you’ve desired for me for so long now, is what God has wanted to give me all along.  This has been God’s desire for me for so long in so many areas of my life.  I have come to the understanding that my inability to live in freedom has caused me to run away from life – including you.”

 About a month later Roger knocked on the door of my 2 bedroom mother-in-law home in Wallingford with a big bouquet of flowers.  He was painfully nervous. I was painfully calm.  I invited him in and said that if he were going to be in Seattle for a few days, I’d get us tickets to a Mariners game.  He was very excited.  I felt obligated to be a good hostess in a way, plus a night at the M’s was always a good time!  He had done his research and made reservations at a beautiful Italian restaurant down town.  I think that was the first time he ever took me to a nice restaurant.  Conversation with Roger was easy, after all, we’d already shared so much of life together.  But my heart was still.  I didn’t have feelings for him. 

The next day he stopped by my office with California Poppies that he got from the market – cute.  He asked if I’d go see Mama Mia with him if he could get tickets.  Sure! – again, I’m up for a free night out!  (horrible, I know)  So in his brief visit we went to dinner, saw a show and went to a baseball game.  I will admit, there was something very different about him.  He had changed.

From the Letter:

“Before, I could not love you the way you deserved to be loved… the way that God wanted me to love you.  Now, I believe that no one can love you like I do.
I love you,
Rog”

Those were the words God spoke to me on my rock over a year ago – and now Roger was in agreement that he hadn’t loved me like God wanted me to be loved.

He flew back to California with another flight booked to come back for my 30^th birthday  the next month.  I had not told my friends or family about any of this for fear that they would forbid it (and eventually my father did).  Roger left Seattle very hopeful.  I said good bye with a small ounce of curiosity. 

A Redeeming Love - Chapter 11

A summer romance series, chronicling my love story

Chapter 1, Chapter 2, Chapter 3, Chapter 4, Chapter 5, Chapter 6, Chapter 7, Chapters 8&9,
Chapter 10

Back together at last! 
But this time was different.  A few months before our second go around I was at a young adult’s bible study with a few hundred people.  Roger was there.  Now that he was back working in Southern California on a cop schedule, we didn’t see him much and he started going to a new church.  I had gone on a few dates since Roger had broken up with me and left for the CHP Academy.  Nothing too serious, but I ran into all those guys that night!  In my journal I wrote:

 August 7, 2001

“I walked away tonight having so many fun conversations with awesome guys, but I can only think of Roger.  He’s the only one who still makes my heart race when he brushes up against me, takes my breath away when he looks at me and smiles, brings me to tears as I watch him worship our  Lord.  My heart loves this man for all that he is, even on bad days, he’s the only one I’m attracted to and the only one that I’m still left remembering at the end of the day.”

 With that, I did something I’ve never done before.  I made the first move.  I prayed about it for a few months and then sat down with Roger and asked if there was ever a chance of us dating again?  I just needed to know once and for all so I could move on.  After a very long conversation and a few days to think and pray, we started dating again – October 26^th, 2001.

 Now our worlds were different – he was a cop and I was in a pastoral role and we didn’t see each other as often.  His work schedule allowed him to pop in for lunch every now and again, but we tried to spend his days off together.  It felt very different than 2 years ago.  We were different.  I realized that in our first dating experience, I romanticized everything about him.  I just loved loving him!  His faults or differences, well, I didn’t pay too much attention!  But 2 years apart helped me grow and mature and this time I knew a little more of what I was getting into.

 The holidays were upon us once again and his job schedule didn’t allow for much holiday play.  Then he got a call that there was a job opening in Sacramento at the Capitol.  Roger’s family was in Sacramento and the job at the Capitol was exciting and interesting.  He flew up for an interview.

On February 4^th, 2002 I spent the morning at the beach reading and praying. 

“Genesis 22 – God tells Abraham to sacrifice Isaac.  This is the son he’s waited for, the son that has been promised.  The son they conceived at 100!  The son of the covenant that God promised Abraham.
   Now God tells him to give him up, kill him!  What is more amazing is Abraham’s radical trust in God.  He totally trusts and takes Isaac up the mountain to obey God and kill him.  He totally trusts God!  Even in horrible, crazy, “you’ve got to be kidding me” circumstances!  Abraham obeys and does what God says.
       He is radically obedient.  To no end.  At any cost.  He obeys.
And God provides, God blesses, God is trustworthy.
I am going to receive this as my message today.
  God I want and I need to trust you like Abraham did!  I need to trust you in my “you’ve got to be kidding me” circumstances with Roger.  I want my reaction to be that of Abraham – radical obedience and worship!”

 God was preparing my heart.  4 days later Roger returned from Sacramento.  I was at his house to greet him and he gushed over his time up there.  They offered him the job.  He accepted it.  When I asked about us, I’ll never forget his response.  “At this point in our relationship, you should play a bigger role in my decision making, and you don’t.”

I was in shock.  We talked, cried and I left, for the last time.  It was over and he soon moved to Sacramento.

 My world was changing.  The college ministry I was leading for now 2 years had grown measurably and I was feeling the weight of carrying it alone.  God gave me a vision for ministry on a trip to Poland and I was to be “#2, not #1” in ministry.  I was no longer to lead this large ministry, but support one who did.  My relationship with the man of my dreams was done for good.  My nest was becoming rather uncomfortable.  I never expected God would use that uncomfortable nest to shove me out of it and make me fly.

PS – only 2 chapters left!!

A Redeeming Love - Chapter 10

A summer romance series, chronicling my love story

Chapter 1, Chapter 2, Chapter 3, Chapter 4, Chapter 5, Chapter 6, Chapter 7, Chapters 8&9

Summer is coming to a close…. How am I going to wrap this up?!!

 As our dating relationship ended, I continued to volunteer in the college ministry, so I still spent a lot of time with Roger.  We were still very close friends, there simply were no more dates or romance.  It was confusing to me – I thought we were so great together.

 With change in the air, I sat down and did some soul searching to find that my true passion was college ministry and I was ready to pursue it full time.  I had been in a long term temp position at a beautiful hotel on the beach and knew it was time to say goodbye and pursue my passion.  Shortly after I decided this, a new position at my church opened up.  The college ministry had been steadily growing and Roger felt that he needed another full time staff member to assist him.  Being a single man in college ministry, he was growing increasingly uncomfortable with counseling college women, so he specifically was looking for a woman to partner with him in ministry.  Now that our dating relationship was over and I was determined to go into full time college ministry, this opportunity seemed perfect.  I told Roger that I was going to apply for the job.  He made it very clear that if I were to get it, we could never date while working together.  I in turn made it clear that if I got the job and he decided that he wanted to date me again, he’d have to quit because I was confident that college ministry was where I was supposed to be!

A few month later I was hired.  I absolutely loved everything about this job.  As new opportunities came up, I discovered different parts of myself and gifts God had given me that I knew nothing about.  I remember the first night I got to speak to the college students at our weekly service.  I had grown up singing solos in church, doing musical theater and dancing, so I was comfortable on stage.  But getting to speak and share my heart was new to me and quickly became one of my most favorite things. 

It wasn’t awkward working with Roger as some thought it might be.  We didn’t have a messy breakup and truly, we worked very well together.  We were both very different in our personalities, approach to ministry and gifting, so together we made a great team.  But that team wouldn’t last long.

Towards the end of the school year Roger announced that he would be leaving Malibu Presbyterian Church to pursue a chaplaincy with the California Highway Patrol.  I knew this meant he would be going away to the academy for training and then perhaps be working in a different part of the state.  I was excited for him and for the opportunities that might come with his leaving.  Shortly after his resignation, I was hired as the interim Director of University Ministries.  Later that position would be permanent.  I was over the moon.  I was madly in love with college students and although my dream man was moving away, I had something to pour all my time and passion into.

I kept in close contact with Roger throughout his time at the academy and was very excited to travel up to Sacramento with some friends to celebrate his graduation the following year.  I also was thrilled to find out that he would return to Southern California to work and live.  It wasn’t long before we were once again dating.  It was about 2 years after our first time dating.  October 26^th, 2001, our second, first date was back at the Happiest Place on Earth – Disneyland!

A Redeeming Love

I think that every story of romance is worth telling. As I recall my own, I myself am amazed at the woven tapestry of love, heartbreak, tough lessons learned and bliss.

I hope you’ll join me every Friday this Summer for my Summer Romance Series:

A Redeeming Love

Chapter 2

Time spent with Mr. M was lots of fun for me.  I’m not sure what I liked more – the fact that so many girls were interested in him and I was the one he chose to spend time with,  or the fact that he was a gentleman and really great company.

I confess that my heart didn’t really leap out of my chest when I was with him, but on paper he was so wonderful in many ways that I continued spending time with him to see if feelings would develop.  As my senior year was wrapping up I had plans to celebrate graduation with a European trip with some girl friends that would end with a cooking school in France with my mother.  Mr. M would be studying in Florence for the summer, so somewhere in the middle, I would meet up with him in Italy.

The trip was a wonderful adventure filled with hostels in Germany, The Sound of Music tour in Austria and then meeting my mother in Rome.  We toured the colossal city together for a few days before departing for Florence where Mr. M had left a lovely message welcoming us to Firenze.  We met him for dinner at a fabulous restaurant where the waiters brought us dish after dish, none of which we ordered!  It was a culinary journey I never wanted to end.  After some time in Florence, Mr. M, my mother and I left for Venice.  It was there that Mr. M shared his true feelings for me.

We were staying in a funky hotel right on the canal and what our room lacked in décor, it made up for in location and view.  It was a rather large room and yes, all three of us would be staying in there together!  Looking back on it now, I’m not sure why we didn’t book Mr. M his own room, it was a little awkward!  One night Mr. M grabbed some half burned candles from an open closet on our way to our room.  We stuck the candles in san pellegrino bottles and used them to light our card game while my mother slept.  I’m still not totally convinced that she was asleep, but it appeared that way.  As the card games finished and the candles burned even lower, Mr. M began sharing his feelings for me and his desire to further our relationship.  I felt very stuck because my heart just wasn’t feeling anything, but my mind was screaming “this guy is a catch!  Go for it!”.  Perhaps my conflicted thoughts had something to do with that Sunday morning 3 months prior.

It was February 1995 and I was 2 months away from graduating from Pepperdine University.  I had started going to Malibu Presbyterian Church that year and really grew to love that church family.  This particular Sunday morning seemed very normal – I went to church alone, preferred to sit in the back by myself, and leave shortly after it was over.  I wasn’t looking for a social event.  As I parked my car and walked up the steps to the sanctuary, I was slightly late and tip toed in the back.  Then I saw him.  Something came over me that I had never felt before.  He was standing on the stage in a navy blue suit sharing the morning’s announcements.  When I saw him I knew.  I said to myself, “I’m going to marry that man one day.”  I didn’t even know his name.  But I knew.

A Redeeming Love

The Summer is here and the Romance Novels are filling the shelves at most book stores.  It’s the simple pleasure of loosing yourself in someone else’s life and dreams.  It’s the easy read while you’re at the beach.  It’s so much fun! 

I think that every story of romance is worth telling.  As I recall my own, I myself am amazed at the woven tapestry of love, heartbreak, tough lessons learned and bliss. 

I hope you’ll join me every Friday this Summer for my Summer Romance Series:

A Redeeming Love

Chapter 1

 It was a romance that was 9 years in the making.  9 years of surprises, falling in love, heartbreak, break-ups, pain, healing and redemption.  It was 9 years of butterflies, smiles, tears, questions, loneliness and discovery.  It was 9 years that taught me what love is and what it is not.  It was 9 years where God showed me His lavish love for me and taught me to settle for nothing less.  It was 9 years of waiting and trusting that God’s timing was perfect.  And indeed, it was.

 As a I child I dreamed of getting married.  I wanted to be married and have children more than anything.  I didn’t have any grand career aspirations because I thought I’d just get married and have babies.  I viewed college as a “time killer” until I met the one.  I never thought I’d be the girl who never dated anyone and wouldn’t get married until I was 31 years old.  But then again, I never dreamed that I’d live a life of adventure and travel the world as a single woman either!

 I never dated in high school and it wasn’t until college that a boy asked me out on a date.  I remember it clearly – he asked me to dinner and drove me to a small restaurant in Malibu.  I had no interest in this boy, but having no experience with boys asking me out, I didn’t know how to turn him down!  Dinner conversation was random and I was mostly dreading the bill… who would pay?  Clearly it was a date, but I didn’t want to presume that he would pay, so when the bill came I quickly grabbed my wallet and offered to pay.  He let me.  That was the last time we went out. 

 I had lots of guy friends and spent time alone with them here and there, but nothing ever serious and definitely nothing romantic.  And then everything changed my senior year at Pepperdine.  I was living with 2 juniors girls and together we had many mutual friends.  One evening a house of junior guys invited us over for dinner.  Their new roommate, a transfer student, would be joining us.  I already knew a lot about him, he had been the topic of most conversations amongst our friends.  He was tall, very handsome, kind, a Christian, and a gentleman.  All the girls had their eye on him!

 I wrapped up my lifeguard training class and headed over to the guys’ house with wet hair in a knot and no makeup.  At dinner I was seated next to the eligible bachelor but honestly didn’t think anything of it, after all, I was a year older than him and not nearly as interested as all the other girls.  So, no one was more surprised than me that he called me the next day for a date.

 For our first date he made dinner reservations (I was already impressed!) and picked me up right on time.  As we headed down PCH along the ocean, we hit some traffic and quickly realized that we would not make our reservation.  We got off the coast highway and headed into Westwood to find another place for dinner.  One thing he didn’t know about me is that I have low blood sugar and as we drove around looking for somewhere to eat, it got later and later.  I started feeling faint.  I began sweating and tried to roll down my window just to have him tell me that my window didn’t work!  We were stopped at an intersection in the little village and I kicked into fight or flight mode and unbuckled my seatbelt and jumped out of the car!  There was a bakery on the corner and I just needed a piece of bread.  As I ran inside, he parked illegally and came in to find me munching on a roll.  The joke became, “If you’re going to ask Jones out on a date, make sure you have some groceries in your trunk!”  The evening ended well and in spite of my dangerous attempt to save myself from passing out, he asked me out again.  He was the first boy that peaked my interest and I was excited at the prospects of more time with him.  Little did I know that more time with him would eventually mean an adventure to Venice Italy.